With more states legalizing same-sex weddings, providing equal rights and recognition of all other married couples to LGBT couples, many are heading down the aisle. Whether planning a more traditional ceremony, or a unique wedding that is a customized expression of love, there are many factors that same-sex couples must consider when planning their wedding, as outlined by Huffington Post blogger and event designer Susan Holland. The four tips below are designed to help same-sex couples start planning their dream wedding.
Bachelor or Bachelorette Events
While a same-sex marriage will have two bachelors or two bachelorettes, the engaged couple must consider if they want all of their pre-wedding events to be hosted together or separately. There are advantages and disadvantages to both. If the couple have mostly mutual friends, or those participating in the ceremony are mostly mutual friends, then a joint event may make the most sense. For couples who choose to have separate bachelor/bachelorette parties, they may want to consider having them on different days, so that friends of both engaged can attend. When it comes to day-of and hair, makeup, or grooming, the members of the wedding party are likely to divide in two so that the engaged couple can maintain the element of surprise when walking down the aisle.
Consider Who Pays For The Wedding
There once was a time where the bride’s family traditionally paid for the wedding, but this is becoming less common even with couples of the opposite sex. Many find this belief to be a bit dated, and the families or the couple tend to split the costs. This does not always mean the costs are split evenly, but often divided between the two getting married, and their family members who are able to chip in. Even more traditional same-sex couples may find it challenging to divide costs, with fewer long-standing traditions upon which to base the decisions, says Mickey Rapkin for New York Magazine. More often than not, it all comes down to who can afford to foot the bill.
Consider How Traditional A Ceremony
Even if both engaged envision a fairly traditional ceremony, there are a few things that must be taken into consideration, will the betrothed wear two wedding dress, two tuxedoes, or one of each? How many will be in the wedding party? These questions aren’t much different from “traditional” wedding planning, and many decisions will still be based on the unique personalities of the couple. Some may want to go over the top, while others want to stick to the script and have spiritual or religious-based ceremonies. The venue can also determine how “traditional” the ceremony will be, depending on whether it takes place at a church or at a special event space for both the ceremony and reception. These factors are determined by how all-inclusive they would like their space to be, or if it is small and intimate or large and elaborate, according to the Grand View Restaurant.
Consider What Last Name To Take
Another thing engaged same-sex couples must take into consideration, is whether both take on a hyphenated name, if both keep their current last names—or do both take a shared last name? If taking a shared last name, whose last name? Think long-term and consider how legal documents can be more challenging for any married couples with differing last names. Also, consider what last name prior or future children will take, and also the challenges parents and children having different last names arise—which sometimes requires parents the hassle of providing proof of guardianship.
Couples, no matter what combination of gender or sexual orientation, should begin planning their wedding by considering the factors above, along with all the other factors that must be taken into consideration when planning a wedding—such as guest list, venue, invitations, flowers, and catering.